Fear or not to fear (or grow or not to grow), that is the question!

It's been almost 2 months since I've been unemployed. That is enough to scare the crap out of anyone in today's job market! What I've been learning in these past 2 months is truly amazing. I'm learning how to tap into my full potential, to harness my fear, to go for those things that I thought were previously out of my reach. I'm also realizing that I may never have grown in these directions had I not lost my job (now that's a brain bender!). For a year prior to losing my job, I had been looking for another position; for too many reasons to enumerate, I wanted to find another opportunity.

Life, they say, is filled with a sense of irony and after I was terminated, it dawned on me how much I had been complacent in some areas of my life and dragging my feet towards a few goals. Sometimes we need motivation to kick it in gear! Shortly after this epiphany, I wrote/posted this quote on my Facebook page,"Being terminated without justifiable reason is the Universe's way of saying, 'It's time for you to go because there is a much better opportunity waiting for you!'".

I'm learning that when fear is standing in my way, there's something grand on the other side because it's opportunity for growth! As this recent quote is teaching me, "Fear is not your enemy. It is a compass pointing you to the areas where you need to grow." ~ Steve Pavlina

For me, my exercise in facing fear is about action, but not being attached to an outcome. In other words: learning to not take it personally if something doesn't work out. My sole responsibility is to show up, be prepared, do my best and put it in the bank, so to speak.

Last Monday, I blogged about experience with cold networking at 10 different IT providers in the area. My goal was three-fold:

1. Conquer my fears by generating courage to step out of my comfort zone and grow in an unknown area (cold networking).
2. Practice for job interviewing -- pitching my elevator speech, selling myself.
3. Create networking possibilities, opening doors, exploring the market fully. 

As it turns out, out of the 10 prospects, one of the companies called me the next day for an interview and interview #2 with the same company is scheduled for December 20th. If you don't ask, the answer is always no! Sometimes it's not only about finding opportunities, it's also about creating them!

Along the lines of converting fear into courage, tonight I watched this inspirational YouTube video about how to conquer fear in 30 seconds. Even more amazing is that I've been practicing these principles and didn't even know it :)

I love how Brian breaks down the theory and practice. Some quotes/excerpts from his video:

THEORY:

• There's a difference being fearless and being courageous.
• We ALL get afraid! Having fear is normal. 
• It's not about not being afraid, but what you do when you feel that fear.
• Feel the fear and do what needs to get done.
• Develop practices to push through the fear.
• Aristotle: the virtous mean -- too little courage is cowardice; too much courage is rashness.
• The word courage from French and Latin for "heart".
• Without courage you can't manifest your full potential.

PRACTICE:

1. Breathe.
• Deep breathing calms you.
2. Reverse your desire -- get excited about fear!
• Reversing your desire: Fear keeps us in our comfort zone. On the other side of fear is Infinite Possibility!
• When you start feeling fear, this is a great opportunity for growth!
• When you start feeling fear, know that Infinite Possibility exists on the other side!
• Our freedom exists on the other side of our fear.
• Realize that fear is not something intended to limit me.
3. Optimize your expectations.
• Optimize expectations -- go from negative to positive.
• If we fear, we expect things to go wrong.
• If we are excited, we expect things to go right.
• It's not about getting rid of our fear, it's about developing courage.
4. Go do it!
• When you feel fear, spend first 10 seconds breathing.
• The next 10 seconds, think of what can go wrong and RIGHT.
• The next 10 seconds, breathe in the excitement!

Quotes to inspire:

• "Fear is excitement without the breath." ~ Fritz Pearl

• "Fear is not your enemy. It is a compass pointing you to the areas where you need to grow." ~ Steve Pavlina

• "The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek." ~ Joseph Campbell

• "Everything you want is on the other side of fear." ~ Jack Canfield

• "The obstacle (fear) is the path." ~ Zen Proverb

• “Fear is a question: What are you afraid of and why? Just as the seed of health is in illness, because illness contains information, our fears are a treasure house of self-knowledge if we explore them” ~ Marilyn Ferguson

• "The most difficult thing is the decision to act; the rest is merely tenacity." ~ Amelia Earhart

• "If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place." ~ Nora Roberts 

• "He who asks is a fool for five minutes; but he who does not ask remains a fool forever." ~ Chinese Proverb

• "Decide you want it more than you are afraid of it." ~ Bill Cosby

• "Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy." ~ Dale Carnegie

• "On the other side of every fear is freedom." ~ Marilyn Ferguson 

• "You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing, which you think you cannot do." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

• "Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway." ~ John Wayne

• "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear." ~ Ambrose Redmoon

• "Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable." ~ Helen Keller